We all tend to think that we’re people that hurt no one. But all the same, we say and do hurtful things to manipulate people who love us. 

Today, let us reflect carefully on what we tend to do, to hurt those close to us. Do we tell them they aren’t a good enough.. spouse, son, daughter, parent, employee, anything else? Do you raise your voice or say harsh words when you’re angry? Do you deliberately do things you know will hurt that other person to get back at them? There is no need to judge ourselves for the things we do, but there certainly is a need to change the fact that this happens – There is absolutely no excuse for hurting someone else deliberately. 

Not only is there no excuse, but when we open our eyes, we see that we only ultimately hurt ourselves for a short-term bargain or illusion of control. This habit of hurting people ruins our relationships, we lose credibility with the people we love, and lose the capacity to open up and be vulnerable with the other person too because you cannot want to control another person and give your heart to them at the same time. If we want deep and fulfilling relationships, we have to learn to be kind and forgiving, and own our pain instead of blaming or trying to fix the other person.

Let us be more non-violent in our hearts. When we own our pain, it makes it easier to manage the pain as well as our relationship. When we try to change the other person in order to remove our pain, we only create more problems.